Steady My Heart

"I'm not gonna worry...I know that You got me right inside the palm of Your hand...Each and every moment...what's good and what gets broken...happens just the way that You plan." -Kari Jobe

As most of you know, I started college on Monday.  I haven't been inside a classroom for the purpose of learning since 1997.  I, like most, tried college immediately after high school without knowing exactly what I wanted to do in life.  This plan was not so good for me since I'm the type that needs a plan before attempting anything.  I need to know what the outcome is going to be before I start.  It gives me a sense of purpose...an outline to follow...a feeding of my OCD.  Therefore, I lasted one semester at NAU (Northern Arizona University) and made a poor attempt at a second semester at GCC (Glendale Community College). I barely passed one of my classes which ironically was Psychology 101 (I find humor in it).

As the years passed, and passed, and passed, I found myself drawn towards health care.  It makes sense to me since practically my entire family has experience either being in Radiology or Nursing.  My wheels began turning and before I knew it I was granted the financial aid I would need to get this show on the road.  It's only been 16 years.

Holy time travel, Batman!! Things sure have changed in the past 16 years.  My first day of classes left me thinking, "I can't do this!".  Everything is computer based...even my Math class.  I started to feel old.  I felt old because I'm generally the oldest person in each of my classes (I think I may be younger than most of my instructors..whew!) and technology has really gotten away from me.  All of a sudden I NEEDED to have Windows 7 (which meant a laptop with the program loaded), a backpack practically made to carry everything including the kitchen sink, and possibly some hair dye to cover the grays.  I'm serious!

I started to panic.  Well, I started to panic before the first day but this made it all sink in. Then something happened towards the end of the week.  I realized that worrying wouldn't get me anywhere.  God told us not to worry, to not be anxious for tomorrow.  I truly believe that God's got this for me.  I gave it all to Him.  Guess what happened after I let it all go?  I was able to get my very first laptop with everything I will need to complete homework assignments and even have the capability to use it for personal stuff should I choose to do so.  Granted it took me six hours and seven different stores later to find the one I needed but it worked out.  For this I give thanks to God.  He kept me safe while traveling all over Richmond.  He led me to the right person that would tell me exactly which store had the laptop in stock.  He gave me patience to get through the day without running anyone over with my car.  He provided!

"Even when it hurts...Even when it's hard...Even when it all just falls apart...I will run to You.  'Cause I know that You are the lover of my soul...Healer of my scars...You steady my heart." -Kari Jobe